Suffocation. Too much pressure. It needs to stop or I'm going to explode.
I need some air, I need space. Too many expectations, too many people sticking their noses in my business.
Backstabbing at it's finest. People could tell you things if they knew that you wouldn't know it was them. Couldn't they have told it to my face? Telling me that I'm some flirt when I know for a fact that I haven't been entertaining anyone. Girls, silly, shallow, stupid girls trying to get me down. I pity them.
The only way that could make them feel better about themselves is to point out qualities that are found in themselves. Kind of like that saying "It takes one to know one."
Mom, expecting me to graduate with high grades.
Dad, excepting me to still be on the softball team.
Nanny, expecting me to do the projects of my baby brother.
Sisters, expecting me not to turn out to be like them. I have 2 older sisters, one of which had gotten pregnant and the other, let's just say has a lot of issues.
Mom expecting me to take care of my baby sister and be a good example.
Too much. I'm suffocating. That's the worst feeling in the world. You don't know where to go. You don't know whether you should just take that leap or stand on the edge a little bit longer.
No more. I can't do this. This has got to stop. I'm too tired to think about this. I am ashamed of myself for letting the things that people think about me get to me when I know it isn't true.
It hurts. I need to deal with this whether I like it or not.
No comments:
Post a Comment